Monday, June 28, 2010

Single Brown Female Seeks Adult

I don’t date. Let me take that back. I haven’t found anyone worthy to make me want to date. Not for a very long time. And I’m alright with that. I really like my life right now which seems to freak a lot of people out. Especially since I like just fine how it is, solo. So recently during a big reunion back in town, I shared a little kiss with new friend in highly charged emotional gathering. Lots of drinks, hugs and kisses were to be had by all. And now “new friend” sends me the occasional text asking about my day which is nice. He lives a long way away so that makes it even nicer. So today he asked me how I like the kiss. Odd. I said it was nice. Then he says, (I kid you not) “so how good on a scale of 1-10”. Okay. Now I’m kind of losing it. How old are we? In my entire 46 years (15 of them were married) I have never had anyone ask me to rate their kiss. So I asked if he wanted to know because his ego was that big or because he was that insecure. He said he was just curious. Then he wanted to know what my friend thought of his kisses. WHAT????? As I write this I just got another text asking me what my friend thought.

Now you see why I don’t date. Seriously? Okay fellas. Don’t ask us that. You will force us to lie or be unnecessarily mean. That’s like asking us if these jeans make us look fat. We just want to appreciate the moment and savor the memory or, in some cases, look forward to more.

I, for one, am ready to put away little boy’s games. I don’t want to kiss and tell and I don’t my kissers to either. I want a gentleman to pursue me. To take the time to learn about me. Here’s another example. The reverse stalker. I have an older man very interested in taking me out. We did have a cocktail together. He was way to needy and way too aggressive. Though I politely explained that I am not able to provide him with all he needs at this time, he continues to call and text. I don’t respond as to not encourage. He doesn’t need me to. They keep coming. The thing is, I am 99% sure he hasn’t done one thing to learn anything about me except we are possibly the only two single people in my rural town who haven’t dated each other yet.

I love the notion of dating. Of lying awake at night not being able to stop thinking about someone. To look forward to the next time together and yet not letting it consume you. To find someone happy in life to share with is not easy. I’m told its harder the older we get. Maybe I’m too old fashioned for my time. But I want someone to want to know about me. I want to know about him. I want us to share things but be happy with who we are in our own lives. And most important is someone who lets you be you. Does it exist? A flower at my door. A note on my car. A dinner and a peck on the cheek at the end of the night. Maturity without infirmary. Playfulness without games. Chemistry. Doesn’t sound that hard does it? And yet its darn near impossible. Dating. Is it a lost term in today’s high speed world? It seems we can’t get “there” fast enough. Happily Single Brown Female Might Some Day Be Interested In Someone Just to Share the Ride. Think it will happen?

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Stupid Stunts or Responsible Tutorial?

Talk about being lumped into the same category! So my son is experiencing 15 minutes of fame once again this week. This news coming to us via his You Tube account where several people told him one of his fire tutorials had been featured on CBS The Early Show. Sure enough. Our excitement was soon diminished slightly when we saw the clip and how it was labeled Stupid Stunts.

As you see, the clip shows various “hey dude…watch this” type of stunts. Then the segment takes you to my son’s tutorial where it is determined my son is teaching children how to swallow fire. Um no. Oh, where to begin.

First of all…my son spends a great deal of time in his tutorial discussing safety. My son is currently 18 years old and began this hobby at 17 with my supervision. In fact, the boy made me sit down and watch his safety video so that I would know what to do in the event he had an accident. Anyone one who wants to learn from my son must first hear about safety just as my son did with his fire mentors.

Second. Would you like to know where I was when my son shot this video? On the other side of that wall in my house where I could hear everything and was on hand should a problem arise. Where were those children’s parents when they were making their vinegar and baking soda concoction? Or when they were car surfing?

There is a vast difference in the style of these You Tube clips that were presented in this segment. A difference in safety, age and supervision. I agree that there is a danger in children emulating what they see on You Tube that could be dangerous. But how is it different then what they see on television on a daily basis or at the theater? Again, discussions should begin at home and if your child is of appropriate age and wants to experiment in a hobby that can be construed as dangerous, do your homework and learn the safety issues that are involved and by all means, SUPERVISE!

As a mother of a child with a diverse hobby, every fiber in my body wanted to send him to his room and tell him to put the flame out. I spent the first 17 years of his life teaching him NOT to play with fire. He had to convince me that his practice was safe and always supervised by myself or someone else he is close to with a fire blanket at hand.

I’m not angry for CBS for using my son’s tutorial for this segment. In fact, I thank them for drawing attention to a responsible young man who has learned and teaches others safety in his craft. His You Tube hits have gone through the roof! But what I would like to have seen is the use of this video as an example different from those he was compared to. And example of responsibility and safety. CBS, if you are reading this, we are trying to contact you about safety on You Tube. Let us know if you are interested in a rebuttal.